http://www.colby-sawyer.edu/currents/news/EatingsDisordersCapstone.htmlUh Oh, OK well I'm going to have to get serious for a moment...I know, I know but it won't take long. That is a picture of me when I was in high school and battling my eating disorder - I weighed around 90 pounds (which wasn't the lowest weight I reached). Looking back at that picture, it's quite scary knowing that back then I thought I actually had weight TO lose. I have been doing a great deal of reflecting, and this has led to my efforts to research various volunteer opportunities with young girls. During my search I was surprised and dismayed to learn that eating disorders are continually increasing and have been documented in cases where girls are as young as 10. Our girls are not okay.
I originally started a blog over a year ago hoping to reach out to women in their teens as well as adult women still struggling with this issue. I named my blog, "Pretending to be Beautiful," because that is what so many of us do. It has taken me a long time to get to a happy place of self acceptance; and in so doing discovering one of life's little secrets (that being comfortable with who you are is a gift you can give to yourself and that in life joy can be found in so many things, things that are lost in an endless pursuit of control and perfection when it comes to your body and your looks).
Reaching 82 pounds and being the skinniest girl in my class I thought would make me so happy. It didn't; I was too busy crying over my hair falling out in clumps and it got to the point where I was afraid to take showers because of all of it slipping down the drain. In my experience I found myself crying over losing my friends because they didn't understand what I was going through, and crying over being too weak and having to take a naps right after each school day. I was simply JUST BUSY CRYING.
Many roads may lead us down the wrong path, and I have sympathy for all (and empathy for a few) but however we get back on track, and whomever we ask for help, what was important for me and what I want to impart to you is to look past our traditional ideas of beauty, of "cool", of controlling our bodies (if we can control nothing else) and to instead look to find the meaning of life and one's happiness in it, as it is our right to do. For me, happiness lies in love, laughter, family, friends, giving back, GOTCHA jokes and many glorious shampoos for ALL MY HAIR :)!
I intend to dedicate a significant part of my life (in whatever way I can) helping women find their way back to happier roads, and however one gets there, the moral of my story is that YOU CAN, YOU CAN overcome anything!
I originally started a blog over a year ago hoping to reach out to women in their teens as well as adult women still struggling with this issue. I named my blog, "Pretending to be Beautiful," because that is what so many of us do. It has taken me a long time to get to a happy place of self acceptance; and in so doing discovering one of life's little secrets (that being comfortable with who you are is a gift you can give to yourself and that in life joy can be found in so many things, things that are lost in an endless pursuit of control and perfection when it comes to your body and your looks).
Reaching 82 pounds and being the skinniest girl in my class I thought would make me so happy. It didn't; I was too busy crying over my hair falling out in clumps and it got to the point where I was afraid to take showers because of all of it slipping down the drain. In my experience I found myself crying over losing my friends because they didn't understand what I was going through, and crying over being too weak and having to take a naps right after each school day. I was simply JUST BUSY CRYING.
Many roads may lead us down the wrong path, and I have sympathy for all (and empathy for a few) but however we get back on track, and whomever we ask for help, what was important for me and what I want to impart to you is to look past our traditional ideas of beauty, of "cool", of controlling our bodies (if we can control nothing else) and to instead look to find the meaning of life and one's happiness in it, as it is our right to do. For me, happiness lies in love, laughter, family, friends, giving back, GOTCHA jokes and many glorious shampoos for ALL MY HAIR :)!
I intend to dedicate a significant part of my life (in whatever way I can) helping women find their way back to happier roads, and however one gets there, the moral of my story is that YOU CAN, YOU CAN overcome anything!
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